Happy Fucking Valentine's Day

I had fucking JURY DUTY today. Everyone at the Los Angeles Superior Court (with the exception of one very patient and courteous bailiff in Department 55 of the criminal court downtown) is fucking RUDE and INCOMPETENT.

After wasting my entire goddamned day sitting in the jury assembly room (thank God I brought work, which I finished in about 3 hours and then sat around wishing I had a fucking computer), they finally called me to a courtroom at FOUR O'CLOCK PM. This is an asstastically stupid time to call a jury panel, as the court closes at 4:30. The idiot judge swears us in and tells us we have to come back tomorrow at 10:30 a.m. for jury selection. I hope maggots eat his toes. He did NOTHING productive by having us come in at 4:00. He could JUST AS EASILY have called a new jury panel tomorrow at 10:30 a.m.; the difference would be he would only waste ONE day of their time, whereas he is now wasting at least TWO of mine. For my trouble I will receive a grand total of fifteen fucking dollars. I make fifteen dollars in about as many minutes. This is bullshit. Next time I get called I'm seriously tempted to just pay the $1K fine (yes, $1K) and be done with it.

As a delicious irony, this being V-Day and all, it's a domestic violence case. Me being the unabashed radical feminist (not to mention, you know, attorney) that I am, you would hope that no one would want me on this jury (having an independent mind and all that). My mom and secretary both seem to think they're so desperate for people there's no guarantee I'll get off (what, they're desperate? When they pay people fifteen dollars for two days of jury service? How can this be?). Well fine then. The instant anything remotely sexist comes out of the mouth of the defendant, his attorney, or any of his witnesses, he's earned himself a prison sentence (short of a hung jury).

Also, I have plane tickets to Boston next Friday, and I'm taking that flight. So they'll either have to finish the trial before then, or they can wait until I'm back to get a verdict.

This is so fucking retarded. This is my VACATION time they are taking. I get ZERO billable credit for this. They are robbing my PERSONAL time. And the "payment" for service? Thanking us for "taking time out of [our] busy day[s]"? What a fucking insult. I'd rather they do us the dignity of just admitting that this is the ass-rape of voters that it is, and apologize for not having the intelligence to think up a more efficient system (say, one that doesn't make me waste an entire day before I'm even called, "just in case" they might randomly need me), and maybe flagellate themselves a little. Seriously, I'd much rather have that than some insulting $15 check.

Oh, also, Blogger forced me to switch to new Blogger today. Fuck you, Blogger. I prefer the old Blogger.

And now back to making up for all the work I had no time to get done today.

UPDATE: Yay for plea bargains!!

God, I feel dirty just saying that.