Sunday, March 11, 2007

A wine-lover's worst nightmare

I have lost my sense of smell.

I don't think it's permanent. I certainly hope it isn't. I'm on the tail end of probably the worst case of allergies I've ever had. Yesterday I noticed I couldn't smell anything. I mean ANYTHING. I sprayed on some perfume before going out and realized that I couldn't smell it. I couldn't figure out if it was the way I wanted to smell that day. I held the bottle to my nose, held my wrist to my nose. Nothing. I was driving past a McDonald's with a friend. "Man," he noted wistfully, "that smells REALLY good." I grimaced. "I can't smell a damn thing."

At church this morning, I think I could slightly, SLIGHTLY detect the scent of the incense. This must be a good sign. But even so -- this is pretty damned terrifying. I've spent the day experimenting with different smells. I even opened the dumpster outside my apartment and took a good long whiff. Jackshit nothing. Coffee? What a joke. Tequila? I wish. Mint? Nope. I can't even smell PEPPERMINT OIL. Not vinegar. Not Tabasco. At this point I'm simply hoping against hope that none of my food is spoiled, because if it is, I won't know until I get the joy of spending my night vomiting.

Dad has "prescribed" Claritin and a sinus rinse, which is about as enjoyable as it sounds. It involves squirting solution into one nostril and allowing it to come out through the other -- or in the case of one of my nostrils, which is apparently particularly stuffed up, out through the mouth. Yum!

Being the Type A obsessive anxiety-prone individual I am, I've scoured the internet for resources indicating what the hell is going on with my body and why. Since this appears to be triggered by allergies, there's a good chance it will simply clear up on its own in a few days. Other possibilities: permanent neurological damage of unknown causes, or cancer. And I won't know until this clears up, or I get a CAT scan.

Allergy shots are sounding more appealing by the second.



At March 11, 2007 at 6:56 PM, Blogger Gino said...

sounds like a good time to go to the fish market.

At March 11, 2007 at 8:28 PM, Blogger heartinsanfrancisco said...

Hey, come over here. We have a skunk on the loose. I bet you could smell that.

I was reading about global warming this morning. Apparently it causes longer growing seasons, which results in more pollen and other allergens. Perhaps you are experiencing some of the fallout from that.

I hope you smell better soon. :)

At March 11, 2007 at 10:05 PM, Blogger odderie said...

MAJOR bummer. *hug* It's like whenever you have a cold and lose your ability to smell/taste/breathe/insert-something-here, and you finally realize that you don't know what you have until you lose it.

Good luck and hope this clears up soon!

At March 12, 2007 at 9:34 AM, Blogger The Law Fairy said...

I'd kill to smell a fish market or a skunk right now :P

heart, I'm happy to blame global warning for this. I want remuneration from Big Oil!

odderie, SERIOUSLY. I keep telling myself how once I get my sense of smell back, I'll NEVER take it for granted again. Nothing tastes good -- it's all bland. I had fruit for breakfast today, and I LOVE fruit. It was nasty and sour-tasting. Everything is so much more enjoyable when your nose is working.

However, I have a ray of hope. After doing the super-fun sinus rinse a few times, I'm now able to smell a FEW things. This morning I was able to smell my peppermint oil, one of my bubble bath gels, and my deodorant. And I could just very faintly sort of smell my perfume. So I think this will blow over in a few days. But in the meantime, it's damn freaky.

At March 13, 2007 at 6:42 AM, Anonymous Anonymous said...

Use the naso-pure. It draws out all the gunk and shrinks the tissue (like swimming in the ocean). I've been doing it at work too. I use the water right out of the warm tap, add some salt from a packet in my pocket.

At March 13, 2007 at 1:16 PM, Blogger DarthImmortal said...

I wish I could lose my sense of smell for a couple of days. Horse shit spreading cultists have attacked St. Louis and left their filth everywhere.

At March 13, 2007 at 1:36 PM, Blogger The Law Fairy said...

Anon, I'm using something that sounds similar. But I'm not ready to start flushing my nostrils at work... we'll see how I'm feeling in a few days if I still can't smell anything!

Careful what you wish for, Darth. Quite honestly, I'd kill to be able to smell horse shit. This is fucking SCARY :(

At March 14, 2007 at 5:11 PM, Blogger Drewcatt said...

Welcome to my entire life LF... Not that I can't smell anything, but my sense of smell is notoriously horrid.

I mean, something has to be particularly pungent for the odor to register with me.

Ugh. I wish mine would get better.

At March 15, 2007 at 10:13 AM, Blogger The Law Fairy said...

Drew, man. That's rough. That's how my nose is acting right now, and it's disconcerting. I've at least recovered a fair deal of my sense of smell (after nearly a week), but I miss the nuances.

I suppose the bright side is smelly stuff doesn't bother you as much... but, yeah. I'd prefer to at least have a CHANCE at being a sommelier ;)


Post a Comment

<< Home