Monday, April 02, 2007

Fear not, fellow Man-Haters(TM)!

Your Man-HatingTM Queen has returned for more Hatin' on Teh Menz!

I just got back from an awesome nine-day-long rest-and-relaxation visit back home Man-HatingTM Spree!

My first act of Man-HatingTM involved staying up late to chat with my mom and dad a patriarchal asswipe with whom she conceived me, though I usually pretend not to know him it. It sure was fun, filling them in on the details of how I'm doing exciting work in the career I've worked hard to succeed in because I'm ambitious and driven and would ultimately, someday, like to achieve some good in the world I Hate MenTM!!

This was followed up later in the week with a massage selfish Man-HatingTM act of slut-tastic relaxation in which I allowed someone not my husband to touch my body in a manner that pleased me. Then Mom and I met up with one of my old college professors for dinner Hated MenTM by purchasing food, for ourselves, with money we made working Man-HatingTM jobs. We also made sure to tart it up like the slutty little Man-HatersTM we are by wearing bright, attractive clothing.

I also spent some time hanging out with my brother watching Season 2 of my latest TV obsession, Battlestar Galactica plotting ways to overtake the man-pigs in my "family" and turn them into my man-slaves, as is the secret ambition of all Man-HatersTM like myself.

Of course, I also attended services at the church where I was confirmed six years ago, because even though I may not always agree with the rector's politics, I respect and like him and many other members of the church, and I think that my common faith with them can in many circumstances (e.g., Sunday services) transcend our real and important differences plotted the subversion and ultimate destruction of Christianity because I Hate MenTM, and God is a man, so I hate God.

The highlight of my trip was getting to visit with my sister, a fellow Man-Hating FeminaziTM, and meeting her new boyfriend, with whom she's planning a trip to visit me next month oblivious soon-to-be man-slave.

So, sorry for the break from the Man-HatingTM you've all come to expect from me. I promise it will be back in full force shortly!

* I felt it was time for a post where I came out and admitted, for reals, how much I really, truly, deeply Hate MenTM. I realized that some of my posts might have been a little ambiguous on the whole Man-HatingTM thing. I mean, in some of my posts it actually looks like I favor rights for gay men, when clearly really I only say these things as a great big "fuck you" to ALL men. And in some of my posts it even looks like I get along with the men pigs in my family, which is total bullshit. The only reason I ever spend time with them is in the hopes that one day I'll have the chance to hurt them, deeply and permanently. Everyone knows I'm a big ol' Man-HaterTM with a capital F! As are all women with the gall to demand basic respect and equality.

** See? Feminists make jokes, too!

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17 Comments:

At April 2, 2007 at 5:33 PM, Anonymous knights13_ghost said...

I'm a pretty bitter person too. lol The best way to get a man is to leave him and abort his baby afterwards. He will have no voice over keeping the baby. ouch

Let the war begin. :P

 
At April 2, 2007 at 6:18 PM, Blogger The Law Fairy said...

Hmmm...

 
At April 2, 2007 at 11:25 PM, Blogger Gino said...

ROTFLMAO!!!!!!!!!!

loved it.
you didnt by chance take my defense of you without the intended sarcasm, did you?

glad to see yer back.
next time, tell me when you leave town, young lady.
ya had me all worried and stuff...

 
At April 3, 2007 at 8:20 AM, Blogger The Law Fairy said...

Sorry, Gino, didn't mean to worry anyone.

I figured you were sarcastic. So, two can play at that game :)

 
At April 3, 2007 at 10:38 AM, Blogger Sarah said...

I laughed my bum off. Now I'm going to hate on all the menz in my office.

 
At April 3, 2007 at 12:54 PM, Blogger Drewcatt said...

I'm a self-hating man (I hate all other men)... does that make me a feminist?

:D

 
At April 4, 2007 at 12:03 AM, Blogger heartinsanfrancisco said...

But, but, but... you didn't really mean it?

Can you say c.a.s.t.r.a.t.e, children? I knew you could.

 
At April 4, 2007 at 12:57 AM, Blogger John-Michael said...

This is hilarious! Looking forward to future "man hating" blogs. Personally, I'm thinking about trademarking "gays against gays." :)

 
At April 4, 2007 at 6:41 AM, Anonymous knights13_ghost said...

"This is hilarious! Looking forward to future "man hating" blogs."

White man hating blogs. Because we all know all the pain and suffering in the world rests on the shoulders of the white man.

"But, but, but... you didn't really mean it? "

Depends on what day it is.

 
At April 4, 2007 at 8:55 AM, Blogger The Law Fairy said...

Sarah, you go girl!

Drew, okay, but you have to hide your penis. Shhh!

Heart, what a brilliant idea. Because then they'll never become men! Everyone knows that having a penis = Being A Man.

John-Michael, I think Ted Haggard may have beat you to it ;)

knights... not that you would ever try to put words in my mouth. You should start your own blog so I can play, too!

 
At April 5, 2007 at 10:42 AM, Blogger Drewcatt said...

LF, what's a penis? Oh.... it's that!

And if I hide my penis does it mean that I'm going to miss it, and crave one to fill the void in my life?

On an unrelated note, your favorite woman-stalker pissed off the wrong judge it seems.

http://www.msnbc.msn.com/id/17965830/

 
At April 5, 2007 at 1:46 PM, Blogger The Law Fairy said...

Drew, well, I can only speak from personal experience, but I've never felt unfulfilled due to a penis deficiency (no pun intended) ;0)

And thanks for the article! That is some damn good news.

 
At April 5, 2007 at 4:16 PM, Anonymous knights13_ghost said...

"knights... not that you would ever try to put words in my mouth."

No, I wouldn't do such a thing LF. I would try to speak the truth for you if you have a hard time doing it.

"You should start your own blog so I can play, too!"

I'm not good with the internets. Plus, I'm no fun at all.

 
At April 5, 2007 at 4:57 PM, Blogger The Law Fairy said...

I would try to speak the truth for you if you have a hard time doing it.

Not sure what you're trying to imply here, knights. I know you disagree with a lot of my opinions, which is fine -- I'm always up for a good argument, especially when there's the possibility of my learning something and/or gaining a new friend. But by making it into an issue of "truth" it sounds like you're suggesting I'm a liar. I don't like being called a liar.

 
At April 7, 2007 at 8:27 PM, Anonymous knights13_ghost said...

"I don't like being called a liar. "

Nah, you are not a "liar". I was just trying to get on your nerves. :P

If we look at lies then we would have to measure them in some way. We all lie depending on the situation presented to us.

Some of us are not good liars. It is "kind" of possible, to tell the truth when you are lying. That is what I was trying to imply. Hopefully, this doesn't come out as messed up logic to you. *crosses fingers*

 
At April 23, 2007 at 3:56 PM, Anonymous Roy said...

I totally knew you were hated the Mens!

You almost had me fooled, but now I see. I'm totally on to your games now, LF.

 
At April 24, 2007 at 7:48 AM, Blogger The Law Fairy said...

roy, I can only hide from my true self for so long ;)

 

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