Sunday, January 22, 2006

SNL recap: Sarrrrrrsgaarrrrrrrrd!

The sketch worth watching this week featured one of my favorite under-represented groups: pirates! Yarrrr! I think most every movie would benefit from a healthy infusion of pirates. If Syriana had pirates in it, it might have actually made sense -- well, probably not, but it would have at least been entertaining. King Kong? It had everything -- except pirates! Ang Lee, looking for a follow-up to Brokeback? Let's do a movie about the prejudices encountered by gay pirates marooned on the lonely seas. Mark my words, Ang: cinematic gold!

The sketch in question involved a pirate convention whose special guest was invited for his pirate-friendly name: Peter Sarsgaard. It featured a question-and-answer session that had nothing to do with Sarsgaard himself ("Sarrrrrsgaarrrrrrd, do you know what the movie Wedding Crashers was rated?"). Another good sketch featured the Peter Sarsgaard SARS guard (a surgical mask with Peter's picture on it) -- but the pirates are the clear winner this week.

Is it odd that in spite of the fact that he's incredibly creepy and has a fleshier physique than most of the guys I've dated, I find him irresistably sexy?

Update: here's a clip of the sketch. Yarrrrr!

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At January 22, 2006 at 3:28 PM, Blogger Micah said...

I like Sarsgaard a lot, but not enough to get me to watch SNL. The pirate skit sounds like it could be funny, though.

And since you brought up men you find sexy, I thought of you when I watched the Wedding Crashers DVD commentary recently. The future Mr. Law Fairy (Vince Vaughn) mentioned that he no longer lives in LA and has taken up residence in Chicago. Did you move a bit prematurely?

At January 22, 2006 at 5:02 PM, Blogger The Law Fairy said...

I actually don't have a big thing for Vince anyway. For some reason I tend to be more into random not-your-typical-hunk-of-the-month guys. Like Sarsgaard, Hayden Christiansen, Topher Grace, Ewan McGregor. Ohhhhh and Christian Bale. Mmmmmmm Christian Bale.


I already knew he was relocating though -- remember, that's how the whole thing started! I saw him stalking me in my building in Chicago. Yup, he was stalking me. Yup, yup, yup. I had to move to Los Angeles to get away from him. That's precisely how it went down.

Geez, I hate having to fight hot, rich, famous men off with a bat.

At January 22, 2006 at 5:09 PM, Blogger Micah said...

I swear, one's memory tends to go with age. I swore that A) you had a thing for him and B) your post way back when was about him shooting a movie in Chicago.

Just don't let the new 007 break your heart. Or is he TOO "non-hunky"?

At January 22, 2006 at 5:40 PM, Blogger CM said...

It was the first SNL I'd seen in a while, and I thought SAARRRsgARRRRd was hilarious, but everyone else in the room thought it was dumb. I mean, yeah, it was a one-joke sketch like so many SNL sketches, but they did so much with that one joke.

At January 22, 2006 at 5:45 PM, Blogger The Law Fairy said...

micah -- I direct your attention to this post and this post -- maybe "anonymous" confused you. Or perhaps the excessive drinking has finally killed some of your brain cells, as I'm sure it has mine.

CM -- so few of us anymore have such excellent taste and a keen sense of what's funny. It breaks down like this:

fart jokes: almost never funny

pirate jokes: almost always funny

Down's Syndrome jokes: funny, dammit, and I'm not ashamed to admit it

At January 22, 2006 at 6:41 PM, Blogger Micah said...

Yeah, the alcohol was probably what did it. I drank more in my first semester of law school than I did in my 4 years of undergrad. Seriously. I think all professional schools must be like that because my good friends who are/were in med and vet schools are the same way.

I was kidding about the new Bond, btw. That post I remembered.

Oh, come on: fart jokes are always funny. I direct you to Blazing Saddles, Dumb and Dumber, and Rodney Dangerfield in Caddyshack.

Down Syndome: let me just say that I've heard clips of Chris "Corky" Burke's music and they make me laugh. And then there's this:

Kid with Downs wins the race
Even though he stood in place Olympics
Special Olympics

'Round his neck gold medals hung
Resting on his giant tongue, Olympics
Special Olympics

-Stephen Lynch, "Special Olympics"

I'm going to Hell.

At January 24, 2006 at 8:27 AM, Blogger The Law Fairy said...

Something about grad school seems to encourage borderline alcoholism, I think. I definitely drank more first year of law school than in undergrad.

I think you've just pointed to the one fundamental divide between men and women: fart jokes. They just aren't funny. Sorry to break it to you. I appreciate Mel Brooks as much as the next person -- but I much prefer the clever silliness of Spaceballs to the low-brow bathroom humor of Blazing Saddles.

And -- ::ducks:: -- I've never seen Caddyshack.

At least both (all?) genders can enjoy a good old fashioned retard joke.

Shit, I'm going to hell too.

At January 24, 2006 at 4:14 PM, Blogger jasdye said...

keeping clear of the slow people's jokes (at least in public).

but fart jokes are just dang lame. sorry, d&d'er is one of my faves of all time, but the pee-in-the-bottle gag was the gold here. as was the, 'john denver's full of **it.' ummm, the moped, the 'for a good time'-sodomy, the outfits, the iou's, the bird getting popped w/ the cork, the dead bird sold to the blind kid (not the same one, right? it's been a while),the strangulation fantasy, the sheep-dog car. yeah, those are all funny.

fart jokes are at best a distraction from the funny. unless my grandma farts. now, that's funny!

At January 24, 2006 at 6:02 PM, Blogger The Law Fairy said...

jasdye -- thank you for shedding a sane perspective on the fart thing :)

The dead bird was hilarious! It appeals to the part of me that laughs at evil things. Which is a big part of me.

At February 7, 2006 at 10:38 PM, Anonymous eteraz said...

i agree with you: that pirate skit was one of the best in recent times. up there with celebrity jeopardy, "I'll have the rapists for fo hundred, alex" - "You mean therapists, Sean?"

I especially laughed when they asked Sargard what the movie wedding crashers was rated?



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